Happy February to all followers of the Gregorian calendar! Before we get into it, I need to do some brief housecleaning — 1) I embarrassingly published my last post out of order, and while there’s nothing I can do about it now, I’m addicted to posting about my own L’s online. Sorry if it sucked! 2) I need to address the rumors head-on: I was laid off in the sense that my position was terminated, but I wasn’t laid off in the sense that I still have a job. And that’s all I’ll say on the matter!
If you know me, or if you’ve been subscribed to this newsletter long enough to see my Tidal Rewind every year, you know I’m a huge Usher fan. And unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’ve probably heard that the 45-year old superstar will be headlining the Super Bowl Halftime Show on Feb. 11. I’m thrilled that the main pop boy daddy for 30 years running is finally getting his due, but I also feel like the enthusiasm from other people just isn’t there.
I fear that, to the general public, hits like “Yeah!”, “OMG”, or “DJ Got Us Fallin’ In Love” are a thing of the past, and for that reason, they think his time to take the stage on football’s biggest night is behind him. But with my Usher expertise and my respect for the craft that is the Super Bowl Halftime Show, I can prove to you that Usher Raymond IV is not only deserving of his literal 15 minutes of fame, but has the potential to put on the best Halftime Show in years. (I mean, the man has Roman numerals in his name, for Christ’s sake! It’s a match made in heaven.)
This isn’t just a randomized list of the superstar’s biggest hits of the past 30 years — this is coming from a storied, tried and true Usher fan. So if you’re gonna place bets with your coworkers on what’s to come, make sure to read this list in full before putting any money down.
We open with a drawn out instrumental of “Confessions” before we hear the words “Everything that I’ve been doing is all bad” from off-stage. As Usher slowly rises from inside the stage, we hear “I just wanna confess what’s been going on so long / doing you so wrong.” The crowd goes wild, and the instrumental blends into…
“Confessions Part II.” Usher of course hits us with a “Watch this” a la his NPR Tiny Desk Concert from 2022. He sings the verse and the first chorus. Break to talk to the crowd.
Because we’re already in Confessions mode, the logical next step is “Yeah!”, and I think he’ll bring out Lil Jon and Ludacris because why not.
To keep the energy going, next he’ll bust out a verse of “Standing Next To You,” which is a Jungkook song I just learned about that apparently has a remixed version with Usher. (Usher’s new album, Coming Home, due out on Feb. 9, also features the duet, so I feel like there’s a good chance for some cross-promotion here.) I don’t think he’ll bring out the BTS star, but I do think he’ll do a verse on-screen while Usher changes costumes.
Sonically, the natural progression from here is “U Don’t Have To Call,” where he’ll do a chorus and a verse.
Next, he’ll ask the crowd if he can “slow things down,” which will prompt him to sing “Nice & Slow.” I think he’ll perform the first verse, chorus, and bridge.
Afterwards, he’ll make an off-handed comment that his album Confessions turns 20 this year, before breaking out into “My Boo.” But instead of dueting with Alicia Keys, he’ll bring out his girlfriend from 2001-2004 and 1/3 of TLC, Rozonda “Chilli” Thomas. They’ll share a moment together on stage before walking off arm-in-arm. As they leave, we hear a voice calling for Chilli off-stage. That voice belongs to Keke Palmer.
Palmer will ask if this means they’re getting back together, Chilli will say no. Palmer will make a reference to being single, before asking Chilli what Usher’s “deal” is. UR will come back on stage, tell Keke she’s interrupting the show, and the two will get into a little lover’s quarrel. This will be the lead into “Don’t Waste My Time,” which he will perform on rollerskates.
Much like at his Las Vegas residency show, he’ll then go into “I Don’t Mind,” but not before the on-stage DJ samples some old hip-hop and R&B hits. (Usher has gone on record saying he’ll be paying tribute to the Black trailblazers who came before him and whipping on the rollerskates, so this is actually has the potential to be my most accurate prediction.)
The DJ will spin some old Usher tracks (“U Remind Me,” “OMG,” “You Make Me Wanna…,” and “Caught Up” are all possible options) while the headliner completes one last costume change. He’ll start to play “DJ Got Us Fallin’ Love”, which will be Usher’s cue to return to the stage.
After a quick verse/chorus, it’s time to start winding down the show. I don’t know why but I can’t shake the feeling that “Love In This Club” will be the closer. Artists love to end the Halftime Show on a ballad (Prince closed with “Purple Rain,” Beyoncé with “Halo,” Rihanna with “Diamonds,” I could go on), but it’s not too ballad-y that it’ll feel out of left field. Fin.
Cut to a commercial announcing Usher’s upcoming tour, a la Beyoncé announcing The Formation World Tour in 2016.
And there you have it, folks! To reiterate, these are my predictions for Usher’s Super Bowl Halftime setlist, not my dream setlist. If it was, Usher would play “Simple Things” twelve times in a row before doing a verse from “Lil’ Freak” — without the N*cki M*naj feature, obv. I’ve also turned my run-of-show into a playlist, which you can listen to here, in case you want to experience real music for once.